#1

me: hi do you take walk-ins  the morgue: what
me: hi do you take walk-ins the morgue: what

#2

Gym  after  work
Gym after work
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#3

also i may or may not have dismembered  him with it. there was lava, he was  yelling, i cried. it was a bad few days.
also i may or may not have dismembered him with it. there was lava, he was yelling, i cried. it was a bad few days.

#4

DRIVE  LIKE YOUR  KIDS  LIVE HERE
DRIVE LIKE YOUR KIDS LIVE HERE
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#5

current emotion: dogs who are stuck  but pretending everything is fine
current emotion: dogs who are stuck but pretending everything is fine

#6

Listen, i have about 14 contacts in my phone.
Listen, i have about 14 contacts in my phone.
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#7

Get Lost
Get Lost

#8

When you use the flower filter to look  innocent but you're still a venomous  bitch
When you use the flower filter to look innocent but you’re still a venomous bitch
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#9

a relationship with a good flirt to  roast ratio
a relationship with a good flirt to roast ratio

#10

Sniff Butt
Sniff Butt

#11

You were not born to just pay bills and die.
You were not born to just pay bills and die.

#12

Before and after puberty
Before and after puberty
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#13

Confronting your own toxic behaviors  and self destructive tendencies like
Confronting your own toxic behaviors and self destructive tendencies like

#14

Studying a week before exam.
Studying a week before the exam.
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#15

I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE  BUT I WILL FIND you, AND I WILL KILL  YOU
I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE BUT I WILL FIND you, AND I WILL KILL YOU

#16

How much do you want?
How much do you want?
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#17

this could be us
this could be us

#18

Attempt at making friends ex jealous:  unsuccessful
Attempt at making friends ex jealous: unsuccessful
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#19

Who Would Win?
Who Would Win?

#20

How to run? (Correctly)
How to run? (Correctly)
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#21

when she says size doesn't  matter and you pull out the 2  inch punisher
when she says size doesn’t matter and you pull out the 2 inch punisher

#22

You are doing a great job, Donald
You are doing a great job, Donald
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#23

God: bite into this onion like  it's an apple
God: bite into this onion like it’s an apple

#24

Turn your screen...
Turn your screen…


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